Kelsey SmithI get this reminder at very difficult points in my life. It usually arrives when I am depleted, when I am overextended, or when my body is screaming for attention that I have been too busy to give.
The reminder is simple: Choose Your Damn Self.
Right now, I am in the thick of it. As of today, I have been bleeding for 15 days. It is a scary, frustrating reality that warrants yet another doctor’s appointment. It is looking possible that I will have to make a tough choice—one that could result in extended downtime.
This is not convenient. Not for my business, not for my lifestyle, not for the momentum I have been building. It is messy and it is hard. But it is what I may have to do to save myself.
We often talk about “self-care” as bubble baths and face masks. But true, sovereign self-care is often inconvenient. It is disappointing people. It is pausing. It is making the terrifying decision to put your own oxygen mask on first, even when the whole plane feels like it’s going down.
If you are standing at a crossroads, wondering if you have permission to prioritize your own well-being, let this be your sign. Here are 7 reasons why choosing yourself isn’t just an option—it is your true obligation.
1. You Are the Only One Living Your Life
Not your relative. Not your friend. Not your significant other. You are the one who wakes up in your body every morning and goes to sleep in it every night. You feel the weight of your choices directly. When you do things solely for the expectations of others, unfulfillment can rear its ugly head. You must build a life that you can live with.
2. You Are More Self-Sufficient Than You Realize
Fear tells us we will crumble without the validation or permission of others. The truth is that you are stronger, more resilient, and more capable than you know. You have navigated every “personal winter” up to this point. You can navigate this, too.
The more you practice this self-sufficiency, the more comfortable you become with listening to your intuition. When you trust yourself to handle the outcome, you stop looking for external validation and start tuning into your own inner wisdom. That quiet voice that says “this isn’t right” or “I need to rest” becomes the loudest authority in the room.
3. You Have a Purpose That Must Be Executed
You were not put here to burn yourself out for the convenience of others. You are carrying a Noble Intention, a unique spark that the world needs.
Think of your body as the vessel for that spark. If the vessel breaks, the light goes out. To execute your purpose, you must treat the vessel with the same reverence you treat the mission itself.
Sacrificing your health doesn’t serve your purpose; it silences it.
4. Choosing Yourself Opens New Portals
When you say “no” to what drains you, you create space for what sustains you. Choosing yourself opens your world up to new possibilities and adventures. It may prompt you to finally take that trip to Bali or try out that hip new restaurant in a nearby town. For me, choosing myself has opened my world up to greater creative pursuits, such as painting outdoor décor, something I really enjoy doing.
5. Your Sovereignty Inspires Others
We teach people how to treat us, but we also teach people how to treat themselves. When you bravely choose your own well-being, you become a mirror. You inspire the people around you to do the same. It is a beautiful ripple effect!
6. The Support Is There (If You Look for It)
My inner bully can take point #2 a bit too far when the truth is, I have a village. It might be a hairstylist who listens, a mentor who encourages, or a “pink sister” who understands. Choosing yourself is also recognizing your own strengths while letting others live out their own Noble Intentions.
7. It Might Just Save Your Life
This is the bottom line. Sometimes, “choosing yourself” isn’t metaphorical. It is literal. Ignoring your body, your mental health, or your safety for the sake of convenience is a price you cannot afford to pay. Take it from me: The ‘thriving’ narrative wanted me to focus on positive vibes. But cancer doesn’t care about vibes. It cares about science. If I had ignored medical advancements to fit a cleaner, more palatable story, I would be metastatic right now. Choosing the messy, scary reality of being informed over the comfort of denial is the single most important decision I ever made.
I don’t know exactly what the next few weeks will hold for me. But I know what I am choosing. I am choosing the inconvenient, messy, terrifying path of healing with my village by my side.
I am choosing my damn self. And I hope, when the moment comes, you will too.
Stay Noble.
